The Mind Behind This
I listened to this
//Thursday, January 6, 2011 3:45 AM
Lost and Not Found.
Assalamu alaykum. Here we meet again blog. Having fever and flu but can't shut my eyes tight at the moment.
Something is bothering me and I can't stop thinking about it. But what it really is ? Feeling guilty..? I hardly glance at something nice that people just showed to me. Enough said, "cantek la tu" and continue smiling. Been wondering myself. There is something happening to me here. I caught myself expressionless recently. I always familiar with these kind of expression =.=". Mindless person.. I also have some bad instinct at few things that come over me. I have no idea why and how to cooped with this.
I do talked to my fellows friends like I always did before and we even get more close now, but it seems so terrible when we end up talking about something where they start to asking for my opinions. Been questioned the same things regularly that I don't even have the answers. Until now I still lost..
Terrible which means, I acted like a statue who got no feeling inside. Pardon me..? haha correction, "pretending" like I got no feelings. weird uh ? wondering what to do.
I don't listened and give all my concentration too much every time I heard about my friend's situations lately, mostly through their status update on facebook. I used to motivated them before, I always did, especially regarding their boyfie or what so ever relationship things.
But now ? I'd rather do some silly jokes attempted to make them feel better and start laughing (even though it's not really funny). So that I won't caught myself looked like I am not doing fine neither. Fake huh ? All I do is just..ignored everything that crossed my mind.
I do care for my friends, I love them. But it just that I don't want to put the burden on my shoulder, messed with my own head for thinking too much and get into other's businesses. I'm afraid if any words that comes out from my mouth, won't be accepted or it even might turned out worse and more complicated to them self. Later, we will end up be the bad person to them.
Like people always said, it easier said than done. am I right people ?
We are all adults now, each knows what is the best for us. Its their privacy and we should not get involved. So let them make the decisions. They are better at it.
Hard to explain why. But honestly I do feel worse at so many time. Is this what we called Jealousy ? Perhaps.. Okay, I think I better stop writing now before I go much further and keep mumbling silly things.
Good night peeps.